Tag Archives: Sex

A Blue Pill Night

A Blue Pill Night

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The suite is large and expectant; its bed a sea of pillows and false potential. more

To The Man Who Loves My Wife

To The Man Who Loves My Wife

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What do you guys do when you’re not having sex? Do you watch television like we did? Is that the faint smell of American Spirits that I sometimes catch the scent of, the bedroom window open to cover it up? Do you ever get too cold sitting up in bed with white sheets covering your naked bodies, puffing on cigarettes?more

Bittermoon

Bittermoon

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Drunk and jealous in an exotic locale, he wonders: “What’s the opposite of a honeymoon?”more

My Girlfriend

My Girlfriend

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My girlfriend has more money than I will make in my entire lifetime–one hundred lives. She’s ambitious and self-made. The handbag boutique, which bears her name in New York, Tokyo and Milan, sold for $45 million. That’s a lot of money, but not enough money to get someone killed and get away with it. Not that she wants someone killed—just saying.more

Cigarettes After Sexism: The Shy-Boy Misogyny of Indie

Cigarettes After Sexism: The Shy-Boy Misogyny of Indie

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I spent most of high school wearing hoodies, reading guys like Salinger, and thinking about a girl called Laura, whose name is not really Laura.more

A Convenient Funeral

A Convenient Funeral

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If you wanna be cool…more

Holy Thoughts

Holy Thoughts

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Catholic, Jewish, Mormon, or Muslim–boys will be boys.more

I See Him

I See Him

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Choice 1: He had the biggest cock she’d ever seen and he had no idea how to use it.
Choice 2: Wait, Brandy’s had an awning? Then why did we get stuck in the rain that night?? more

Satan Stole Her Soul in Vain

Satan Stole Her Soul in Vain

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“But before we ‘made love’ (or whatever you like) we went to the laundromat, and before that, we were in a bar…”more

Noose

Noose

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After you lost to her for Class Treasurer you kissed her in the coat room and grabbed one pre-boob.more