Today I turn 20 and lock my eyes on the future. Like many others today I take the State’s Cognitive Aptitude Vocational Exam aka the CAVE. They don’t call it an IQ test but they don’t call anything what it is since the Research came out. Except for Taco Bell. That’s the same. That’s where my GF Minerva works. And thank God because after a night of laser tag and mini golf our favorite thing is to smash a few chalupas and slurp an extra-large Mountain Dew with her employee discount. Just like we did last night. Then we cuddle up for some action movie and suddenly we’re waking up to the exit score over the credits. We’re such dopes sometimes I swear. But I’m not too worried about this CAVE thing. I play a lot of sudoku and I’m really good at parallel parking. And I get why the State went with the Research and made the CAVE. To see how smart we all are. What we’re interested in and good at. How else would they help people live up to their potential or stop them falling through the cracks? Because someone might be real smart but if they don’t have the money for college or know about some opportunity they couldn’t get ahead and now the State can say “Here’s this great path you didn’t know about” and get them to the next level. Or maybe their parents have money but they didn’t get the good genes and would’ve just floundered through all kinds of false starts and now the State can say “There’s a more modest path you can be proud of” and keep them focused on that. This way people get into the careers that best suit them. For now I work at Waste Saving Solutions with my friend’s older brother Tate. We’re the ones moving everyone’s bins to the curb before trash day. We cruise around town in Tate’s sweet-ass turbo-charged F-150 and stop at all the apartment buildings where the property manager is too busy for the day to day upkeep. That’s basically all of them. Which is great for us. Tate pulls around back. We load up the bed and I roll whatever bins are left to the curb four at a time if I have to while Tate yells “Faster” cause he wants me to get in shape. We had to work on Christmas last year but I didn’t mind even with Tate complaining. He still put on a Santa hat when we took off from his house then pulled out a present. Weed gummies for each of us. Score! He smirked “Merry Christmas” then said get this “Just don’t tell my wife.” Ha! I never even met his wife. What a cool guy! And what a great job. I mean it’s not hard. The money’s enough for a one bedroom and the occasional night out. It’s not like garbage is stopping anytime soon so there’s no risk of being laid off or outsourced. Plus Minerva says she likes that my shoulders are “getting ripped.” Her words. She’s the best. We both got made fun of for our weight in high school so we’re lucky to have found each other. We have a pact to always find the compliment. So I have a lot of nice things to say about her. Especially her socks. She has so many fun patterns to choose from from piggies flying and a skeleton bride and groom to ones that say “Keep on sockin in the free world!” Then there’s her laugh. The way her belly jiggles and her face scrunches trying not to snort. I’ll do anything to make her laugh even a cross eyed squirrel face if I have to. But then sometimes she gets upset. And I really hate to see her cry. Which happens like anytime she feels stupid for something she did. Once she asked a friend “How many quarters are in a football game?” and they laughed and she was sad for a week. She didn’t know that pickles were cucumbers and she couldn’t figure out how to clasp her wristband at the zoo. And every time she says something like “I’m so stupid I’m lucky you still wanna be with me.” I’m flattered she thinks I could do better. But she’s plenty bright enough. Love isn’t a test. It doesn’t take smarts. Some people get you and know how to make you feel good about yourself without having to solve a multi-step word problem. That’s what I love. That’s what the State doesn’t get. Minerva’s really worried about the CAVE. She doesn’t expect much when her turn comes. And she thinks if I score too high that’ll be the end of us cause the State will say I have to get a better job and then I’ll meet someone else and I’ll wonder why I’m with a girl that overtips because she can’t do the percentages in her head. But it’s actually smart to be generous. As Minerva says “what goes around comes around.” She’s helping me learn. So when I reach the CAVE sure I could go all out maybe even end up an animator or an electrician or something that looks good on screen. But I can play shadow games too. And when it comes to one of those questions where you figure out what shape the pieces make I can get it wrong. I don’t have to solve which combination comes next in the matrix either. She wouldn’t care. Then the State will let me keep my job with Tate. The sun will keep shining. And after it’s all done we’ll go to the animal shelter. Minerva’s been wanting a dog forever and I’ve been unsure cause yeah they’re super cute and fun but also a lot of work. But if love is making someone feel good about themselves what better than a dog?