\u201cJenkins has got a bull.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJenkins would never let you near that thing,\u201d Jack says.<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, come on, he would never know, the man is half blind\u2014Bernie down the road has a small one too, that might be better, I think that\u2019s the one they used a few years back.\u201d<\/p>\n
Sam laughs from where she lies stretched out on the floor of my bedroom, turning pages of a magazine. It\u2019s something girly\u2014nothing like what she usually reads. I try to decipher the titles over her shoulder, but the light through the window catches the paper’s gloss, so I can\u2019t make them out.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat,\u201d I say, \u201cI\u2019m going to do it whether you are there or not.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll be there,\u201d she says without looking up. \u201cWouldn\u2019t miss you getting thrown for nothing.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJack, tell her I\u2019ll be on that bull for longer than anyone in this town can claim.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re sitting in the same room as a future Glendale champion,\u201d Jack says, poking Sam in the ribs with his shoe from where he sits at my desk. \u201cHe\u2019ll be on that baby for a full 8 seconds.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cMight believe it more if Mr. McBride over here had ever been within 50 feet of a bull.\u201d<\/p>\n
I throw a pillow at her as I sit up on my bed. It hits her in the head, and she gets up on her knees to hurl it back at me.<\/p>\n
\u201cEight seconds is the bare minimum, by the way,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s not my fault no one in this town will let me try it,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n
\u201cThere\u2019s a reason for that.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSam, doesn\u2019t your uncle have one down on his land?\u201d Jack says and leans forward in his chair. \u201cHe\u2019s going to that same convention this weekend up in Albuquerque\u00a0my dad is heading to, right. All the local guys are going.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAbsolutely not,\u201d Sam says. Jack and I look at one another and fall to the floor next to Sam.<\/p>\n
\u201cPlease, Sam, please, you\u2019ve got to help us,\u201d our voices chorus together.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo,\u201d Sam says.<\/p>\n
\u201cPlease, Sam, you know what this means to me. Sam, it’s perfect\u2014”<\/p>\n
Before I can say anything else, she stands.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t ask me again. It\u2019s a stupid tradition; you guys might as well drop it. I got to head home anyway, dinner.\u201d<\/p>\n
She pulls her shoes on and turns to leave. She leaves most of her stuff behind, scattered across my carpet, when she grabs her orange backpack from where it hangs on my doorknob. The front door slams shut.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat\u2019s her problem today?\u201d Jack asks, and I sigh.<\/p>\n
He leaves soon after that, and I pick up Sam\u2019s magazine from my floor. It\u2019s got a tall, lanky girl on the cover. The inside has a ton of writing and a lot of pictures of girls with nice smiles and large breasts.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
I cut some flowers from my mom\u2019s garden the next morning and drop them in Sam\u2019s lap during study hall, placing all the other stuff she left at my house on the table; the flowers are pretty and blue. She\u2019s sitting in the library with an open notebook.<\/p>\n
\u201cNice try,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n
\u201cJust hear me out,\u201d I say. She looks through her stuff, shoving the magazine deep into her backpack. She places the flowers on the table and begins to write again.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n
\u201cSam, it\u2019s going to happen whether you help or not,\u201d I say. \u201cI don\u2019t know when you turned into such a girl about this stuff.\u201d<\/p>\n
Her pen stills, and she looks up at me. She stares for a long time before she speaks.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re not going anywhere near that property without me, and I said no.\u201d<\/p>\n
She puts her stuff into her backpack and stands.<\/p>\n
\u201cWon\u2019t be around later, got a big essay due for Clarke,\u201d she says. \u201cI\u2019ll see you later.\u201d<\/p>\n
She grabs the flowers off the table and walks away. She pauses by the doors, glances back at me, and chucks the lilacs in the trash. The bell rings, and I watch my classmates filter through the library like ants. I pass Jack in the hall later and shake my head.<\/p>\n
Sam doesn\u2019t meet us after school for a ride home from Jack, and she avoids me all the next day. She finds me on Thursday after her science lab. It\u2019s a dusty October day with a strong sun, and I am sitting outside eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow would you do it?\u201d she says from behind me. I swallow my bite as she slides onto the bench adjacent to me.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow would I do what?\u201d I ask.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt,\u201d she says. \u201cYou can\u2019t be thinking about trying to jump on one with no help; there\u2019s no point.\u201d<\/p>\n
I take another bite of my sandwich and chew slowly.<\/p>\n
\u201cWell.\u201d I\u2019m talking with my mouth half-full, which bothers her, \u201cI know some seniors who work at the ring in Glendale in the summers, they said they could help me set it up, help the tradition live on, and all that.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThere\u2019s so much that could go wrong,\u201d she says. \u201cMy uncle would kill me; your parents would kill me.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo one would know. Let\u2019s be real, I won\u2019t be on it long enough to hurt or do any damage to it or anything, if you\u2019re worried about that. Plus, these guys I know are good. They\u2019ll calm the bull down and get it out of the way.\u201d<\/p>\n
She doesn\u2019t say anything for a while.<\/p>\n
\u201cSam, it really will be okay. There\u2019s nothing to worry about.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m not worried.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou seem like it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI just don\u2019t want to get in trouble because of you idiots.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou won\u2019t.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou don\u2019t know that.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOf course, I do, if anyone does find out\u2014you were never even there. No one will rat you out.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSwear it to me,\u201d she says. She props her elbow up on the table between us and sticks out her pinky finger. I link mine around it.<\/p>\n
\u201cI swear it, Sam.\u201d<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
We meet at Jack\u2019s house on Saturday night. It\u2019s a mile from Sam\u2019s uncle\u2019s ranch, and with his dad out of town, we\u2019re alone in the house. My legs are restless as we sit at his kitchen table.<\/p>\n
\u201cThey\u2019ll meet us there,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n
\u201cAre you sure you gave them the correct address?\u201d Sam says, \u201cIt\u2019s hard to find in the dark.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThey got it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat made you change your mind?\u201d Jack asks Sam.<\/p>\n
\u201cJust would rather be there if it\u2019s going to happen anyway.\u201d<\/p>\n
I trade glances with Jack, who looks unconvinced.<\/p>\n
\u201cPlus, I\u2019m the only one that knows CPR,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n
The crickets buzzing in the dry heat outside seem to get louder. Jack fiddles with a spool of rope that\u2019s sitting in between us, before standing and walking towards his basement door. He disappears down the steps and returns carrying a short work light.<\/p>\n
\u201cFor the ring,\u201d he says and grins at me. \u201cWe should get going.\u201d<\/p>\n
I pull the rope off the table, and we get into Jack\u2019s car. I sit in the back, leaning against the seat in the middle. He drives slow along the dirt slope that connects his house to the main road and keeps the lights off. No one speaks; Sam points directions to Jack, and he turns down an even bumpier path. I button and unbutton the cuff of my shirt.<\/p>\n
The car stops in front of a long ranch house. It stretches over a small hill, and it has two large front doors, painted dark\u2014in the dim light, it looks like a gaping yawn.<\/p>\n
No one moves to get out when Jack flips the key off. He flinches when a car approaches behind us, its wheels crushing the gravel of the driveway. They flash their brights at us once, twice, and I step out of the car. The driver rolls down his window; he has a round rim hat on his head.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou excited, kid?\u201d he yells over the engine. He turns the car off, and boys spill out. I recognize most of them; they\u2019re all tall with strong arms and the jaws of men. Sam and Jack get out behind me.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re not going to believe what you\u2019re about to see,\u201d Jack says as he comes up behind me. He slaps his arm around my shoulder, and I wrap mine around his.<\/p>\n
\u201cLongest ride you will ever did see,\u201d I say, and step out of Jack\u2019s grasp to shake the hand of the other driver. \u201cHenry, thank you for the help.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAnytime, man, anything to keep the tradition alive,\u201d he says. He starts to point and name the guys around him, and I smile at them.<\/p>\n
\u201cNow, let\u2019s see this bull.\u201d His friends cheer around him, and Sam motions for us to follow her.<\/p>\n
\u201cWatch your step,\u201d she calls over her shoulder. We make our way down the hill, and I hear some of the guys behind me whispering about Sam\u2019s jeans. I keep my eyes down, stepping over roots and rocks that jut out of the ground. We walk for a while before Sam comes to an abrupt stop; I look up to find a white cattle barn looming over us. She looks at Henry.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou better know what you\u2019re doing.\u201d<\/p>\n
She turns back around and pulls the door along its tracks to open it. The barn is dark, and a heavy musk hits my face before my eyes adjust.<\/p>\n
Henry grabs my shoulder before we walk in.l<\/p>\n
\u201cYou and Jack should go hang out by the ring,\u201d he says. \u201cGo settle your nerves, kid.\u201d<\/p>\n
He turns and follows everyone else inside. Jack pulls me towards a field by the cattle pen. We sit on the ground next to one another. The tree line on the property looks miles away, and so does the dark sky, starless tonight.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll be fine,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019ll be just fine,\u201d Jack says. I have never been able to tell when he\u2019s lying, even when we were kids. He stands up.<\/p>\n
\u201cI think they\u2019re calling us,\u201d he says and pulls me to my feet. \u201cYour time to shine.\u201d<\/p>\n
As we get closer to the pen, I can see them all gathered around one of the gates. The sound of them talking fades away. The bull is grunting behind them, hitting itself against its confines. Henry sits up on one of the gates, looking down at it.<\/p>\n
\u201cGoing to be one hell of a ride,\u201d he says to me. \u201cHe wasn\u2019t too happy to be woken up.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019ll be fine, though,\u201d one of the other boys says. \u201cBail when you need to, we\u2019ll handle it.\u201d<\/p>\n
I nod, and Sam comes to stand by me. Jack sets up the work light, running an extension cord to the barn and back. Two of Henry\u2019s friends sit up on Sam\u2019s uncle\u2019s horses by the far entrance, lassos in hand. They\u2019ll shuttle the bull out of the area once I\u2019m off it.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou ready?\u201d Sam asks.<\/p>\n
\u201cOf course I\u2019m ready,\u201d I say, flexing and unflexing my fingers.<\/p>\n
\u201cHis name is Twinkles.\u201d I laugh without meaning to, and she bumps her shoulder into mine.<\/p>\n
\u201cKnew that\u2019d get you to laugh.\u201d<\/p>\n
Jack gets the light on, and I see Twinkles for the first time. He\u2019s tall, and the muscles in his back are throbbing; snot is dripping from his snout as he paws the ground. Someone has already tied my rope around his abdomen, and his dark body strains against the skinny tan band. The light catches his eyes, and they glint like rubies.<\/p>\n
\u201cCome on, kid.\u201d Henry motions towards me.<\/p>\n
Jack slaps me on the back, and I jump up on my toes a few times to get the blood flowing to my legs. I move towards the fence, but Sam grabs my arm.<\/p>\n
\u201cBe careful,\u201d she says. \u201cOr I\u2019ll kill you before the bull does.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, Ma\u2019am,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n
I climb up on the fence next to Henry, and I\u2019m leaning down over the bull when he takes the hat from his head and puts it on me.<\/p>\n
\u201cNow you\u2019re a real cowboy,\u201d he says. \u201cJust eight seconds, remember; now, get in there.\u201d<\/p>\n
I scoot forward on the railing until I\u2019m next to the pen. I swing myself over, landing square on the bull\u2019s back. It bucks forward, and I grab onto the rope. Its body heat envelopes me as I lean down against its spine, wrapping the rope around my palm four times. I can hear only his breathing beneath me, hot, heavy breaths that make my legs move forward and back against his sides. Short black hair runs rough\u00a0against my hands as I push myself up into a seated position. The points of his long white horns are inches from my face as I look towards Henry.<\/p>\n
He jumps into the enclosure that I\u2019ll ride into, holding a long rod. His friends spread out along the fence but stay on the outside. Jack and Sam stay by me, and the bull beneath me begins to groan and buck, tension rolling through its muscles beneath me. I tighten the rope in my palm and tuck my knees tight against its ribs. I look to Henry, who nods.<\/p>\n
He reaches for the rope attached to the latch, and I stop breathing. The others are shouting around me, but my eyes are on the bull\u2019s neck and then the latch as it raises. The bull breaks forward and bucks upwards. My left hand is raised upwards. The bull\u2019s feet land on the ground again; I feel my bones compound with the force, and the air leaves my lungs.<\/p>\n
Somewhere around me, they are counting slow seconds. Dust floats up around me, and the rope cuts into my soft palm. The bull bucks again, and my legs loosen their grip against its sides. Its sour stench has entrenched itself in my nose. The light shines off the sweat dripping down its skull; I do not know if it is from me or the bull. The animal stops short in its run and bucks again. The hat falls from my head, and my hair flies into my eyes. The bucking is becoming more violent, more erratic, and the braided rope burning my skin loosens.<\/p>\n
The bull bucks one more time, and I am in the air over its horns. I glimpse its jeweled eyes before my back hits the hard earth, and my head smacks backwards. Someone screams. My legs lie crumpled between me and the bull, and I barely notice the boys getting it away from me.<\/p>\n
The sky is navy, and there are the first signs of dawn. Sam\u2019s face appears before mine, and I have to blink hard to realize Jack is there too. I can still hear the bull, but I cannot hear them.<\/p>\n
\u201cHey, hey,\u201d I hear, and it is Sam\u2019s voice.<\/p>\n
\u201cCan you hear us?\u201d I nod slowly.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow long?\u201d My voice sounds far away.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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