My dad called. That\u2019s how I knew the news was bad. In the hotel room where they found you, there were all kinds of drugs. In your system: ecstasy, cocaine, fentanyl. You had told your wife that you were going to work, your\u00a0boss\u00a0you were home sick.<\/p>\n
At your second one-year cake, you lamented the suffering you had put everyone through, but boy, had you not even started yet. During your engagement you asked me if I had any friends who you could have some fun with. P told me later that you had tried to fuck a blood relative, another addict.<\/p>\n
At your wedding, your friend reminisced about breaking into your parents\u2019 liquor cabinet together at age 13. I balked at the appropriateness of the comment, but our aunt hushed me, said this is exactly the kind of speech a best man gives.<\/p>\n
At your funeral, there were hundreds of people. A friend joked about your preference for hot flag girls over male flaggers, which everyone found\u00a0funny. Your aunt complained that the service wasn\u2019t Indigenous enough, which caused a rift with her sisters.<\/p>\n
Afterward, Shawna got a tattoo of you on utility poles, and within a year B had a new daddy and three stepsiblings.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
At your second one-year cake, you lamented the suffering you had put everyone through, but boy, had you not even started yet.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":182,"featured_media":25262,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3529],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-24188","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-flash-nonfiction","writer-jade-mcgregor"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24188","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/182"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=24188"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24188\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":25264,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24188\/revisions\/25264"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/25262"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=24188"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=24188"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=24188"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}