{"id":23883,"date":"2026-04-01T06:00:03","date_gmt":"2026-04-01T10:00:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/?p=23883"},"modified":"2026-04-01T06:00:03","modified_gmt":"2026-04-01T10:00:03","slug":"7-5-undergarments-mandatory","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/creative-nonfiction\/7-5-undergarments-mandatory\/","title":{"rendered":"7.5. Undergarments (Mandatory)"},"content":{"rendered":"

7.5. Undergarments (Mandatory)<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

from Department of the Air Force Instruction 36-2903<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

7.5.2.\u00a0 Females. <\/strong>Also known, culturally, as women.\u00a0 <\/em>Appropriate undergarments are required to be worn with all uniform combinations.<\/strong> How do we define appropriate? You show us yours and we\u2019ll know it when we see it. But, seriously, don\u2019t show us yours.\u00a0 <\/em>Wear bra and underpants with all uniforms.<\/strong> Or be sure we can\u2019t tell that you\u2019re not wearing bra and underpants. Since we require that they remain hidden, we also can\u2019t know if you\u2019re wearing them. We won\u2019t stop you from wearing lacy bras, a whiff of sexuality hinted through the thin-not-quite-opaque Air Force light blue shirt in that way designed to distract and lure your male counterparts (also known, culturally, as men) who can\u2019t be trusted not to notice so it\u2019s up to you to regulate yourselves.<\/em><\/p>\n

We hope (desperately, in fact) that you:<\/em><\/p>\n

1. Don\u2019t regulate yourselves. Delicious.<\/em><\/p>\n

2. Ahem, wait, what we mean is we hope that you:<\/em><\/p>\n

a. Don\u2019t want your bra to quite \u201cshow through\u201d the light blue uniform blouse, <\/em><\/p>\n

or<\/em><\/p>\n

b. Don\u2019t think about wearing purple or red bras signaling their presence under the shirt. Come on, we must tell you to wear undergarments. Surely, we don\u2019t have to spell it all out?<\/em><\/p>\n

c. Don\u2019t realize that we\u2019ll still reprimand you for bad choices that aren\u2019t outlined in this instruction under our catchall: <\/em>Commander\u2019s discretion<\/strong> may be used to determine if individual\u2019s personal grooming is within standards of this instruction.<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Because some of you asked for this, though many of us don\u2019t know why, <\/em>[w]ear of the white V-neck style or athletic tank top undershirt when wearing open collared service uniforms is authorized.\u00a0 Females may wear the white V-neck, athletic tank top or crew-neck style undershirt when wearing closed collar formal dress, mess dress, semi-formal dress, service dress and service uniforms.\u00a0 Undershirt will be tucked into slacks or skirt.\u00a0 Undershirts will not have pockets.<\/strong><\/p>\n

These instructions must be followed.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Except, we hope when in some dark corner defined in levels of privacy from a closet to a porta-potty in a not-too-dangerous or extremely dangerous country that you will allow us to slide our hand up under your physical training uniform, your combat multi-cam uniform, your Airman Battle Dress uniform, under your undershirt with no pockets and cup your breast underneath that lace, or silk, or athletic-bra polyester or maybe even brush your nipple if you are a man meeting the male standard under your required t-shirt our fingers tangled in your chest hair with our hot breath against your neck and our other hand already gripping you to our own uniformed bodies with our desire bulging against our mandatory undergarments just bursting to feel skin on skin after the months of pretending we aren\u2019t human that we don\u2019t need human contact or that our wives and girlfriends and boyfriends and husbands aren\u2019t home feeling the same longing because we all don\u2019t yet want another silent curve of our own hand in a bunk under or over another bunk in a row of bunks hoping no one hears our quickened breath and release and instead that we could just for once, peel back your mandatory undergarments and our mandatory undergarments and plunge all our ungarmented parts into your ungarmented parts because underneath these uniforms we are only human after all and cannot be regulated to be the same and we don\u2019t want you to be the same and\u2026<\/em><\/p>\n

Excuse us. Where were we?<\/em><\/p>\n

7.5.\u00a0 Undergarments (Mandatory).<\/strong><\/p>\n

7.5.2.\u00a0 Females.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Females. Also known, culturally, as women.\u00a0 Appropriate undergarments are required to be worn with all uniform combinations.\u00a0How do we define appropriate? You show us yours and we\u2019ll know it when we see it. But, seriously, don\u2019t show us yours.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":182,"featured_media":24801,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[760],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-23883","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-creative-nonfiction","writer-maxiejane-frazier"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23883","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/182"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=23883"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23883\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":24802,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23883\/revisions\/24802"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/24801"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=23883"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=23883"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=23883"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}