{"id":19998,"date":"2024-07-11T08:12:44","date_gmt":"2024-07-11T12:12:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/?p=19998"},"modified":"2024-07-11T08:12:44","modified_gmt":"2024-07-11T12:12:44","slug":"erection-taser","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/flash-fiction\/erection-taser\/","title":{"rendered":"Erection taser \u00a9"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I\u2019m at the bar with my friend Raz drinking tequila. It\u2019s been an age.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;It\u2019s not just Margaret who wanted me to get one,&#8221; I tell him, &#8220;I wanted me to get one.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>He looks at my groin, shakes his head.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;She\u2019s controlling you, man.&#8221; He clears his throat and looks across at a hottie in a boob-tube over by the jukebox.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Don\u2019t,&#8221; I say.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Zen the fuck out, Charlie boy.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Raz wiggles his forefinger at my groin, then saunters over to the jukebox.<\/p>\n<p>While he&#8217;s gone, I scoop an ice cube between finger and thumb and outline a heart on my cheekbone, wonder how many times Margaret has checked her app so far tonight.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;How do you take that thing off then?\u2019&#8221; Raz burps, back on his solitary stool, tapping the counter for another round. &#8220;She got a key or something?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Touch ID.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Christ.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The bar door flies open and a brunette in boots walks in, the kind you want to nibble and graze on and devour. The kind that makes you feel manly and so very boy. Lights up every sense.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;So what actually happens when\u2026 you know?&#8221; asks Raz.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;It\u2019s not just Margaret who wanted me to get an erection taser,&#8221; I tell him, &#8220;I wanted me to get one.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":182,"featured_media":20474,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3530],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19998","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-flash-fiction","writer-kik-lodge"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19998","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/182"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19998"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19998\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20473,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19998\/revisions\/20473"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20474"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19998"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19998"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19998"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}