I\u2019m a lucky man. Here comes the 99 bus now, the fast one, direct to downtown, and I\u2019m only, what? Maybe two hundred feet from the bus stop? But that orange. It\u2019s uncomfortably wedged between my books and back. How\u2019s a man supposed to run for the bus with an orange relentlessly poking him in the back? I\u2019m so close. I bet I\u2019ll make it.<\/p>\n
Empty bus? Free seat? Great luck. Today, I will not become distracted by the goings-on outside the window. Absolutely not. I\u2019m not the young man I used to be, after all, when I was carefree with my time and my actions didn\u2019t affect anyone else. When I didn\u2019t even realize how lucky I was. When a man gets married it shouldn\u2019t be a surprise that he suddenly has less freedom, less time to work on his studies, for example, and other pursuits. A stitch in time saves nine, she always says. Clever lady. Today, as promised, I\u2019ll use my time on the bus to study the principles of accounting.<\/p>\n
By nature, we accountants are a diligent group; the ones who don\u2019t stay focused on their studies tend to get left behind. It\u2019s in a man\u2019s best interest to get ahead, so I try to always work hard, sometimes before I even know what I\u2019m working hard towards.<\/p>\n
Good luck ultimately comes down to preparation, though, doesn\u2019t it? Catching the bus? I was on time. Well, barely. Winning one of the most sought-after apprenticeships? At such a good firm? Hard work and preparation got me here, and I\u2019ll be honest, also a bit of support from the home front. We completed so many applications and submitted them promptly. Painstakingly thorough. What a team. You can\u2019t stay ahead if you don\u2019t get ahead, she says.<\/p>\n
It sure is hot. Gonna be a scorcher, if it\u2019s hot this early. Sweat\u2019s already gathering under my tie. And what a tight tie today. My undershirt\u2019s getting soaked too. A breeze sure would be refreshing. If I could just get this window open. Success. Hah! See? Persistence does pay off.<\/p>\n
Unfortunately, when my wife tidied me up this morning, she told me if I take my jacket off and loosen my tie on the bus I wouldn\u2019t be able to fix it again properly for the office. But I do know how to fix my own tie. I do notice the little things! I don\u2019t tie it as tightly as she does, though, that\u2019s probably true. She\u2019s better at things like that than me, no question.<\/p>\n
When you\u2019re going to be an accountant you must be honest with yourself and others. You can\u2019t be misleading. It\u2019s important to practise that trait outside of the office as well. It\u2019s true I\u2019m a neat and tidy man with a neat and tidy mind so it really is best if I reflect that with my appearance.<\/p>\n
I\u2019d better get my bag repacked before anyone else gets on this bus in case I need to share my seat. Well, would you look at that? Without the orange, my lunch fits perfectly. Everything else in my pack is also thin and flat and now it all fits together so well.<\/p>\n
This orange. This orange has some heft. Not much bigger than a baseball, this orange. It would have momentum, that\u2019s for sure. That window provides such a pleasant breeze being so wide open, and there\u2019s just that weedy derelict boulevard out there. Wouldn\u2019t hurt a soul. I could really get my arm crooked, loaded up, if I did it now. But I probably shouldn\u2019t. My wife and I, we don\u2019t like to waste.<\/p>\n
Everyday my wife puts an orange in my lunch. Don\u2019t get me wrong; I love oranges. Or at least I used to. And I love my wife. We\u2019re newlyweds. And although she was the one who proposed getting married, I jumped on the idea. At the very moment she first brought it up, I was fully on board. That was a very private moment for sure, but I was all-in at the time. It\u2019s having the same piece of fruit each day I find I can\u2019t stand.<\/p>\n
I must focus on my studies but it\u2019s hard in this heat. If you perform accrual accounting, you make a record at the time services were received. If it\u2019s the cash method you\u2019re using, you record from when you received payment. Expenses and revenues must match in any given time period. They can\u2019t get out of balance.<\/p>\n
That principle lodged firmly in my brain I permit myself a brief respite to look out the window. We\u2019re driving by the school now, where high-pitched chattering children are scattered at play before the morning school bell, wilder even than normal. They must be excited about their upcoming summer break. I might get a week off this summer too. But, ah, it\u2019s only an apprenticeship, and already I\u2019m barely getting paid. Vinyl seats sure stick to a sweaty back. Better sit up straight. Clever lady. So, probably no vacation this year, actually. You\u2019ve got to invest in your future though. Always look ahead.<\/p>\n
In the playground, a pair of boys in billowing t-shirts and loose shorts sit under a drooping willow tree, bent over, what is that? A game of chess. Nice. A third boy sits close by in solidarity, scribbling in a notebook. We\u2019re moving again, passing by the sports field, where in the far corner a group is gathered. Ah, baseball game. Hmmm… there aren\u2019t quite enough players, the teams look uneven. Never mind. The pitcher is lined up for a throw, he raises his arm, no, just a warm up, and\u2014ah, we\u2019re going too fast. I would have liked to see how that pitch turned out. I bounce my orange. Put a little spin on it as it lifts off my hand and down again.<\/p>\n
I know this route well. Next, we\u2019ll whoosh through a seedy, but intriguing, section of bars and\u2026establishments advertised by signs of dancing girls flashing in neon. Not many requests to stop there, this time of day. Then we\u2019ll whizz right through the residential neighbourhood, dotted with houses of worship of all kinds of faiths, and finally, our journey will slow down, interrupted by the many stoplights and pedestrian crossings at the edge of downtown. Not much to look at there, a monotonous stretch of grey concrete buildings, sealed high-rises, a few banks at street level. My destination is soon after that. Glass office towers, mini-big box stores selling business supplies, shops with fancy clothes for ladies and gentlemen, corner quick-stops with anything you might need to pick up and carry home with you straight away after work, mini-groceries, even baby supplies.<\/p>\n
Accountants must be objective and free from personal opinion. All data needs to be supported by evidence. As an example, for the sake of my studies, what are the qualities of an orange that would be recorded as an asset, in the positive account? Well, an orange is a perfect parcel. It\u2019s a most excellent fruit for carrying on its own. Very practical. The skin is tough and thick; nothing in your backpack will pierce an orange. Smooth or dimpled, the orange will safely make the journey with you to work or school. It even has a tiny pleasant scent, not so strong it distracts in the moments before lunch break when my stomach growls, but strong enough to linger on my books and bag.<\/p>\n
The trouble with oranges materializes when it\u2019s time to access the fruit inside. That rind, so useful at protecting the orange, is a terrible ordeal to get off. How can you bite into fruit to enjoy it if you can\u2019t even get the peel off? You need to dig your nails in, even to get the first chunk out. It takes a real commitment to dig deep enough to get through all that white stuff. What even is that useless protective layer? It leaves a residue under your nails and stings your cuts. I have a long slice on my index finger now from working my way through this stack of papers I cart home and back. Liabilities for sure.<\/p>\n
Once I\u2019ve finished this apprenticeship and passed my exams, I will be an accountant and can support my wife. Forever. I will probably be sent to work with an orange every one of those days. You\u2019d think an orange could be a passionate fruit. A peel, a challenge, a reward. Every day I try to look forward to my orange. I think eating my orange will be a delicate sweet moment. Each day I become more disappointed. When you finally get the rind off, you\u2019re made aware of another truth. If the segments do separate easily, the orange will likely be bland and pulpy. If not, if you\u2019re lucky and you have a sweet, sweet orange on your hands, you also have a frightful mess. Those oranges are difficult. The juice drips around you, onto the table, onto your work. It will have seeds you have to work around, so you can only take a little nibble at a time.<\/p>\n
Accountants need to keep their ledgers orderly and up-to-date. It cannot be said that oranges aren\u2019t affordable. And available. And last a long time before going bad. You must record the depreciation of assets from one year to the next.<\/p>\n
Ah, here comes my stop. Quickly now, finish up. At the end of each year, once all assets and liabilities are summarized and weighed against each other, a balance sheet provides a snapshot about the current state of business. And so? For now, I\u2019ll stick with my orange. Even if it\u2019s the same old orange; day in, day out. My practical orange.<\/p>\n
Did the driver not hear me pull the cord? There, he\u2019ll hear that for sure. The orange is an odd lump inside my suit jacket pocket, pushing against my ribs. But I might be hungry later. I must now tidy my mind and join the ranks of office workers disembarking to begin their workdays. This time on the bus has been organized according to Generally Accepted Accounting Principles.<\/p>\n
Though I would even take an apple given a chance. A melon? I\u2019d settle for a melon, slow and lopey, soothing. Anything to switch it up. A mango? I imagine a mango would be a juicy delight, rolling on the tongue like a\u2026 Even a sour mango with its tangy bite of\u2026no, no. What about a lime? A lime would spit in your eye as you struggled to get the peel off. Now that would be a change. A man can dream. Even a soon-to-be-accountant can dream in the few moments he walks alone between his bus stop and work.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
The trouble with oranges materializes when it\u2019s time to access the fruit inside. That rind, so useful at protecting the orange, is a terrible ordeal to get off. How can you bite into fruit to enjoy it if you can\u2019t even get the peel off? You need to dig your nails in, even to get the first chunk out. It takes a real commitment to dig deep enough to get through all that white stuff.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":182,"featured_media":20202,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[3471,3473,3470,3472],"class_list":["post-19648","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-fiction","tag-accountant","tag-bus","tag-lucky","tag-oranges","writer-andrea-bishop"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19648","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/182"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19648"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19648\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20203,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19648\/revisions\/20203"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20202"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19648"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19648"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19648"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}