William didn\u2019t need keys to successfully steal his mother\u2019s navy blue Camaro. He knew how to hotwire it in ten seconds flat and lived for the jolt of electricity that shot through his body every time the engine roared without a fuss. But tonight, he was able to snag the keys from his mom\u2019s purse when she passed out on the back porch, lit cigarette in her hand and a can of Natural Light in her lap, like every night she was off work. William didn\u2019t bother checking his mother\u2019s Outback schedule anymore, even though it was conveniently located on the refrigerator, attached to the yellow door with a magnet that read: Ass, gas, or grass\u2026nobody rides for free! No, William could predict his mother\u2019s work schedule based on how much booze she brought home the night before. Today, she went through a twelve pack and was shitfaced when he came home from school, meaning she was off. She passed out hours before sundown, the fingers of her free hand outstretched as if waiting for William\u2019s deadbeat father to put her to bed. But it was Friday, and William knew he and his best friend Phillip would be getting into something real fun\u2014maybe real illegal, but always real fun.<\/p>\n
He propelled the Camaro onto Combee Road and figured he cut somebody off based on the double bird the driver gave him. It wasn\u2019t like William didn\u2019t see the truck; he just didn\u2019t give a fuck about traffic laws and certainly not about the truck\u2019s driver, whose fingers looked similar to plump kielbasa. William looked out the window as he sped. He noticed a woman, clad in jorts and a wife beater, as she took off from the bushes. He was pretty sure her pathetic, car-less John was counting to ten before leaving, just in case any cops happened to drive by as they often did. Eaton Park was a sideshow.<\/p>\n
When he turned onto Phillip\u2019s street, he watched in the pink twilight as Phillip\u2019s shirtless brother Danny cut the front lawn with a mower that looked older than Jesus. William pulled into the driveway, snugly, right behind Mrs. Collins\u2019 shitty Civic. Danny stopped the mower and waved in his direction, revealing a patch of dark hair under his armpits. He was fourteen now and the sight of him electrified William, making the little hairs on his forearms stand up. He also noticed the way Danny\u2019s tanned biceps flexed and back muscles tensed as he pushed the stubborn mower to a stop. William was intent on beeping for Phillip\u2014hoping to avoid other members of the Collins family at all costs\u2014but he saw Danny walking towards him and decided to get out.<\/p>\n
\u201cHey, Willy,\u201d Danny said, grabbing the shirt which hung from his back pocket and wiping it across his face. \u201cHot one still.\u201d<\/p>\n
William offered his fist, Danny returned the gesture, and William felt a surge of heat trickle into his cheeks. \u201cFuck yeah it\u2019s a hot one. Your mom is a bitch for making y\u2019all mow the lawn in this weather. She must be some kind of sadist.\u201d He was proud of himself, having first learned that word after viewing the bondage porno Phillip gave him last week.<\/p>\n
Danny shrugged. \u201cPhillip was supposed to be helping \u2018cause, you know, Tammy broke her collarbone.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah.\u201d William wanted to pat Danny on the back and assure him it was okay, but he resisted. He wasn\u2019t sure if things were ever going to be okay between Danny and Phillip. \u201cIt\u2019s almost done, though, right?\u201d<\/p>\n
Danny shook his head, draped the shirt across his shoulder. \u201cNope. I still gotta do the backyard.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNot tonight, though. It\u2019s too late. You may be a fast runner, but you can\u2019t never catch up to the sun.\u201d<\/p>\n
Danny smiled. \u201cWant to come inside for a minute?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNaw, man, I\u2019m gonna have a smoke out here. Go ahead and tell your brother.\u201d<\/p>\n
As he watched what was left of the sun dissipate, blanketing the HUD houses and live oaks in horror movie-like shadows, he lit a Kool and inhaled deeply. The menthol sliced his throat, and he exhaled through his nostrils, stifling a cough. He leaned against the closed garage door, smoking and swatting the occasional mosquito. They didn\u2019t normally bite him; his mother used to tell him his blood was too sour.<\/p>\n
Phillip threw one of Danny\u2019s sandals at William, announcing his presence, and William jumped, acquainted with the silence. \u201cWhat the fuck?\u201d William picked up the sandal from the concrete and forced a chuckle at Danny\u2019s expense. \u201cNice to see you too, dick.\u201d<\/p>\n
Phillip approached him, flashing a devious smile and exposing a distinct gap between his two front teeth. William hated the gap. They bumped fists. \u201cLet me get this back to your brother.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cFuck him,\u201d Phillip said. \u201cLet sissy boy Danielle figure it out himself. He\u2019s lucky I don\u2019t rub it in dog shit and shove it down his infected faggot throat.\u201d<\/p>\n
William ignored the insults, he was used to them, and walked into the house. Danny stood in the kitchen focusing intently on making a plate of pizza rolls for Tammy, Phillip\u2019s youngest sibling, who sat on the couch, sling across her chest. William nodded to Tammy and walked into the kitchen, the odor of pepperoni filling the room and replacing the scent of Mrs. Collins\u2019 Virginia Slims. The oven beeped impatiently.<\/p>\n
When Mrs. Collins hollered from her bedroom for Danny to shut that fucking thing up, William realized he had forgotten why he entered the house. He still held Danny\u2019s flip-flop in his dumb hands, and his cigarette was almost entirely ash.<\/p>\n
Danny pressed the button that turned off the oven and spun around, paper plate of baked pizza squares in his hand. \u201cOh hey.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHey. Uh, you left this outside.\u201d He held out his hand, displaying the sandal, aware of his own awkwardness. His whole body was on fire.<\/p>\n
\u201cThanks. You can just put it by the door.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh. Yeah, sure.\u201d He took a pizza roll from Tammy\u2019s plate and pushed it into his mouth. \u201cThanks. See you later.\u201d He knew better than to ask Danny to tag along.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Sometimes, if they scrounged up enough money, they could get someone to buy them beer from the Circle K. As long as Mr. Strickland wasn\u2019t running the register, William knew they could get away with stealing a couple Olde English 32s if they had to. Mr. Strickland\u2019s eye patch hid a hawk\u2019s eye, Phillip always said, and he could see for miles.<\/p>\n
After securing beer plans, William and Phillip usually had to steal a car, but tonight, they could skip that step and get right to picking up chicks. Even though William jacked off three times today\u2014once in the shower and twice more after school, clutching a Hustler magazine, his jeans at his ankles\u2014he still needed a release. Usually, they got two girls, one for him and one for Phillip, and took them out to the old phosphate mines. The thought of this\u2014of bare breasts, sweat, foggy windows, and the sound of friction mixed with desire\u2014made William\u2019s dick move. He hoped tonight was one of those nights.<\/p>\n
\u201cHey man, don\u2019t go that way,\u201d Phillip said as William turned the car back onto Combee Road. \u201cI want to pick up this chick Nikki, and she lives over by Lake Morton.\u201d<\/p>\n
William lit another cigarette and slid the pack to Phillip. \u201cShe better have a friend.\u201d He knew he could get to Lake Morton from Crystal Lake Drive, so he kept his course.<\/p>\n
Phillip lit a cigarette and smoke billowed from his nostrils. \u201cShe does have a friend, this one fire crotch named Caitlin. They\u2019re both from my school.\u201d Even though Phillip and William were the same age\u2014well, William was technically older by two months\u2014Phillip was held back in sixth grade. Phillip\u2019s school, Pathways, served as an alternative school for bad kids, and Phillip, who got caught peddling ground up aspirin and selling it as cocaine, had four months until he could drop out, for the court mandated that he stay in some kind of learning environment until his eighteenth birthday. William didn\u2019t like having to go to school without his best friend, but he did like that Phillip knew girls from all over Polk County.<\/p>\n
\u201cCool.\u201d William took a drag off the cigarette. \u201cWhat about beer?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cLater,\u201d Phillip said.<\/p>\n
They left Eaton Park in the rearview and turned onto Crystal Lake Drive. Almost immediately, the neighborhood began to change. The houses were no longer government issued and most of them had two cars in the driveway, some of them newer than 1990.<\/p>\n
Phillip turned on the radio and flipped through William\u2019s mother\u2019s presets, which were all country and southern rock. He sighed and, after some time, found a station playing Ludacris. Phillip turned it up too loudly, but William didn\u2019t object.<\/p>\n
They entered the Lake Morton Historic District, and Phillip told William to keep going. When they neared the lake, William caught a white man, briefly, in his headlights. He stood along the lake watching the car, the way women do on Combee Road. William looked away, quickly, for he had heard about gay men selling themselves at Lake Morton. He just didn\u2019t think it was true. \u201cWhere\u2019s my turn?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cPull over.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat, where?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cRight here. Pull over.\u201d<\/p>\n
William\u2019s heartbeat quickened, a hammer against dense fabric. He didn\u2019t see any houses, nor did he see any high school girls standing around. All he saw in his driver\u2019s side mirror was the silhouette of the man and the ember of his cigarette. \u201cBut, there\u2019s\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJust pull the fuck over, Willy.\u201d<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Phillip drove back because William couldn\u2019t stop shaking. They traveled in stillness, and William could see the dried blood on Phillip\u2019s knuckles in the red glow of the traffic light. He knew Phillip never intended to pick up any girls. The shame was nauseating.<\/p>\n
When they made it to Phillip\u2019s house, they had to park in the ditch because Mrs. Collins\u2019 boyfriend\u2019s van was parked behind the Civic. William hoped Phillip would just leave the keys in the car so he could drive home, but Phillip took them out of the ignition and climbed out of the car. William followed, not wanting to rouse Phillip or endure another fight.<\/p>\n
\u201cI stole that fag\u2019s joint. Come smoke it with me in the garage.\u201d Phillip dropped the keys into his pocket.<\/p>\n
William didn\u2019t want to smoke a joint. It was well after midnight, and he felt paranoid already though he hadn\u2019t really done anything except watch as Phillip tackled and mounted the man, beating his face until there was nothing left to see but red. The sounds of his fists against the man\u2019s face sounded to William like splattering rain. He wasn\u2019t sure if the man was dead or just unconscious, but his screams stopped about halfway through. Once he was finished, Phillip kicked the man twice in the stomach and spit on him; then, the boys ran back to the car. After William pulled over a block away to throw up, Phillip took the wheel. They hadn\u2019t spoken much since.<\/p>\n
Inside, seated in a swivel chair that was meant for an office rather than a garage, William took the joint from Phillip\u2019s bloody hands. He inhaled, felt the smoke swell in his lungs and move to his belly. Then, he coughed for what felt like hours until Phillip got him a Dr. Chek from the mini fridge. They smoked about three quarters of it before William put it out and set the roach down in Mrs. Collins\u2019 crowded ashtray.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t put it in there,\u201d Phillip said, red-faced from his last toke. \u201cRick will smoke it for sure. Give it to me.\u201d In the smoky room, which smelled faintly of Malathion, Phillip looked devilish; his white t-shirt had blood flecked onto it to match his crimson knuckles. William did as he was told.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Phillip got to the recliner first, so William had to sit on the couch with Danny. It would\u2019ve been fine under normal circumstances, but now nothing was fine, and William wasn\u2019t sure if it ever would be again. He had trouble looking Danny in the eyes when he spoke to him, and he was grateful for Phillip\u2019s continued silence.<\/p>\n
\u201cHey Daniel, make us some more pizza rolls.\u201d Phillip kept his eyes on the television, flipping through channels with a remote held together by duct tape. \u201cGet us some Cheetos too. Not in a bowl, though. Just bring the whole bag.\u201d<\/p>\n
Danny rose from the couch and accidentally tripped over William\u2019s knobby knees. \u201cSorry,\u201d Danny said and William nodded, folding his long legs into his chest. He still felt a tinge of heat when their bodies touched, and his head felt heavy from the weed. He remembered the welts that covered Danny\u2019s body after he\u2019d been caught messing around in Mrs. Collins\u2019 underwear drawer; it had been four years, but William couldn\u2019t forget that Phillip put the welts there.<\/p>\n
Phillip found Pulp Fiction and William fixed his eyes on John Travolta and Uma Thurman doing the twist on the dance floor. Danny was back a few seconds later. He handed the open bag of Cheetos to William, and William took a handful of puffed cornmeal from the bag, placed them on the crotch of his running shorts. Danny passed the bag to Phillip and Phillip put the bag in his lap. After gobbling a handful or so of chips, Phillip would wipe his hands on the arm of the recliner, staining the faux-leather with a film of orange. He never asked William if he wanted another handful, and William never asked either. Neither Rick nor Mrs. Collins emerged from the bedroom, and William assumed Tammy was sound asleep as well.<\/p>\n
Once William\u2019s belly was full of pizza rolls and Dr. Chek, he felt relaxed. He still didn\u2019t think he could drive, but he was comfortable with Danny\u2019s thigh resting against his own. Phillip snoozed on the recliner, feet extended, with the now-stale bag of Cheetos still in his lap and the keys to William\u2019s mother\u2019s car in his pocket.<\/p>\n
Pulp Fiction had ended, and the boys now watched Sharon Stone cross and uncross her legs in Basic Instinct. William wasn\u2019t sure if peeking under Sharon Stone\u2019s skirt was exciting him or the sensation of Danny\u2019s body beside his, but his penis throbbed.<\/p>\n
Without thinking, he put his hand on top of Danny\u2019s. Danny looked over at him. They shared a long stare and Danny interlaced his fingers with William\u2019s. William\u2019s stomach erupted with flutters. He should\u2019ve let go right then, so Danny understood it as a brotherly gesture, but he didn\u2019t. He couldn\u2019t. When Danny put his hand on William\u2019s knee, he didn\u2019t stop him, didn\u2019t say anything either. He just grabbed the fleece blanket adorned across the arm of the couch and laid it across his lower body, inviting Daniel\u2019s smooth hand into the place beneath his boxers.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
William didn\u2019t need keys to successfully steal his mother\u2019s navy blue Camaro. He knew how to hotwire it in ten seconds flat and lived for the jolt of electricity that shot through his body every time the engine roared without a fuss.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":14118,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[1089,1351,1347,1093,1354,1353,1355,361,1348,1352,1013,1147,1349,1168,265,1350],"class_list":["post-13922","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-fiction","tag-coming-out","tag-discovery","tag-florida","tag-gay","tag-homophobia","tag-lgbtq","tag-lit","tag-masculinity","tag-neo-gothic","tag-sexuality","tag-short-fiction","tag-short-story","tag-southeastern-u-s","tag-southern-literature","tag-the-south","tag-toxic-masculinity","writer-emily-hoover"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13922","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13922"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13922\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14117,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13922\/revisions\/14117"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/14118"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13922"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13922"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrbullbull.com\/newbull\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13922"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}