CW: Should we expect to see Ruth and the boys touring the U.S. anytime soon?
BB: I’m sad to report Ruth broke up the band. According to the story I heard, in the moments prior to a sudden onset of dementia, she experienced a short, bright burst of clarity, realizing that her boys had been coasting on the coattails of her talent all along—that their hearts weren’t really in the music she adored so. Rather than put them in the awkward position of lying to her yet again, she broke up the band, in the middle of a half-full Tuesday night happy hour. Her sons had been dipping into her purse for cash to cover the costs of their myriad bad habits, too, but she remains unaware of that. Ruth now spends her days slouched behind a piano at a Medicare-subsidized assisted-living facility where the employees live in fear of her hook. She never actually touches the piano’s keyboard. Ruth’s sons have all wound up in jail, which should surprise nobody.